As a man living in Alaska, known for its ruggedness, you may feel that you, too, must exhibit ruggedness at all times. Unfortunately, the stereotype of the strong, silent male who competently handles everything by himself, with little show of emotion, remains all too prevalent in today’s society.
Adhering to this self-image when your marriage deteriorates and divorce seems inevitable probably will not serve you well. Nor will it serve the interests of your children or even those of your about-to-be former wife. You need a place where you can talk openly and with others who will support you through this difficult time.
Finding emotional support
While the idea of joining a men’s support group may be completely foreign to you, there is nothing wrong with, for once, putting yourself and your needs first. After all, you do have emotions, whether you show them or not. Bottling them up constitutes a surefire recipe for disaster. Your own mental and emotional health dictates that you get the help you know you need to get you through the breakup of your marriage.
Support group benefits
Joining a men’s support group can offer many benefits:
- The other men in the group will act as your sounding board as you contemplate various options and make decisions
- They will not allow you to wallow in self-deception that you are okay when you are not
- They will not allow you to blame everyone else for your problems, but rather help you accept the fact that you, too, contributed to them
- They will provide you a safe place in which you can share your feelings openly without fear of ridicule or rejection
- They will help you cope by means of sharing their own situations and their feelings about them
- They may provide you with new insights into what it means to be a “real man”
Getting your emotions out in the open with other men does not in any way indicate that you are less of a man yourself. In fact, it shows that you want to become an even better man than you already are.